Coming back after the last post.

Coming back to this space after writing the last post was much harder than I anticipated it would be.

And I thought it would be hard.

But every time I came here, and saw the photos of him, I couldn't do it.

There was something too final and too sad about it and I flinched every time.  So I said "tomorrow", and then I said it again.

I said it a lot actually.

But in all that time, I was working, spending time working with my hands and not letting my head get too involved and it was something that I needed to do I think.

To bring me back to a place where I understood that the Goodbyes had been said, but that he was never really going to leave us.  

So I took some pictures, and made more with my hands and felt a change coming that I think has been in the air for a while.

Nothing too drastic, just a shift in perspective and clearer understanding of where I want to take this business of mine, and of taking steps to learn how to do this better.
Because if you have been reading this ridiculous blog for very long, you will have noticed that I am a bit of a wanderer when it comes to content.
I like things that are silly.

I like things that are light.  And easy.

But this summer has not been easy.  And it has not been light.  And it has led me to a place where I am finally seeing this Thing that I Do, this handmade life I am making for myself and my family, in a new way.

A way that, I hope, will create a path to living the life that I want.
Not just the life I am given.

I expect that I will come back to silly.  Probably sooner than I would like to think I will.
(Let's be honest, I am still ME after all)

But I am clearing some clutter from this space.  From my life too.
(you should see my closet, I am paring down in all nooks and crannies.)

I read something that stuck with me recently.

Identify the Essential.  Eliminate the rest.
(I found it while browsing here)

I have taken it to heart.  And I am working very hard to make the life that I want.  For myself and my family.

If I haven't already lost you, I hope that you consider sticking around and seeing what we get up to.
xox

getting ready for the week ahead!

I'm sitting here in front of my computer, looking at my list of "Things To Blog" and I am totally impressed that NONE of the prep work for ANY of them was completed this week!

Literally none of it. 

And to be totally fair I have actually had to take some time out of the studio this week due to an awesome detox reaction that has FOR REAL made my right hand a mess of blisters.

EWWW gross!

Yeah don't I know it.

It's finally starting to heal up to the point where I can kind of do stuff, like laundry, dinner and general day to day things.  But I worked on a pair of Mini Barnacle earrings (I would totally show pictures IF I ONLY COULD!) for a friend's birthday this week and it was all I could do to finish them.

It's so weird!

But.  It could be worse, and they are mending so I am just doing my best as we go.

So I am going to sign off here, and go take some pictures with my NEW IPHONE
(honestly, I don't know why I held out for so long) of some stamps that I carved up for a workshop that I did a few weeks back and I'll even take a picture of MYSELF (whaaat!) wearing a sample for another workshop THAT YOU CAN TOTALLY SIGN UP FOR coming up in a couple weeks.

We're stamping scarves!  You get to keep it!  Seriously, go check out Poppet's spring line up of workshops RIGHT NOW!

The Incredible Disappearing Blogger

That's me.

Which you know already since I haven't managed to post anything in 2 MONTHS.

Let me fill you in on my new lifestyle...

Toddlerhood. Is. Insanity.

It's really funny and cute, but it does not allow for a whole lot of free time for computer fun.
(except for pinterest, DO NOT GET ME STARTED ON PINTEREST)

ohhowILOVEpinterest!

I actually put the pinterest app on my phone and so I spend even LESS time on the computer than previously... which is kind of impressive since it was only about 45 minutes a day all summer... sometimes every other day even!

Anyway.  
Toddlers.

Are THE BEST and totally hilarious and ohmygod the ENERGY!

WHERE is it COMING from??

Oh yeah it's that 2 and a half hour nap every day, recharging his Crazy Battery.  The one where Mama get's to put away laundry or think about cleaning the bathroom (today I actually wiped down the sink! PROGRESS) or eat lunch while drooling all over pinterest...

I love it when people are all "oh don't worry about laundry, just enjoy your lovely baby!  
OH I DO, seriously.  But this Mama AIN'T impressed or pleased or in anyway interested in dealing with screaming/running/climbing/squirming/cuddly baby while trying desperately to find a clean diaper or the baby wipes (where do they GO??  we use them ALL THE TIME!!) while at the same time getting dressed (in hopefully clean and work appropriate clothing...last week I actually went to work in pajamas.  I jazzed them up by wearing mascara... and getting to the bus on time.

I am a woman who needs a little order in order to function.

So a lot of my extra time is spent maintaining the least amount of order so that I don't become an angry crazy person who screams at the neighbors in her underwear.
(I'm not quite there yet thankfully!)

I don't think I can express just how much joy and peace I get out of this life when I open a drawer to clean up poo YES POO and the wipes are exactly where I expect them to be.  This means that I don't have to wrangle a half naked Wild Boy and get human feces on my clothing or person.

The other day I had to reach into the washing machine and pick up a poop nugget with my BARE HAND that had somehow survived the wash cycle.
???

Someone please tell me how it can do that.

So please forgive me when (I am not even going to pretend) I disappear from the intertubes (technical term I learned) and just know that I am really trying to be productive and present and as awesome here as I am in real life with my Incredibly Awesome Kid and Super Rad Husband.

And also know that I am working on jewellery (slowly but steadily) and drawing and sewing and generally making Janamade a real thing.

Very slowly, true, but I am still at it and I am not giving up.

I'm just loving this little family of mine first and foremost.

xox